Thursday, October 13, 2005

What is it about me?? I mean really.....

What is it about a person that attracts a very specific demographic of the population to them? In some cases it's obvious, like gym bunnies that attract other gym bunnies, or emo twinks that attract other angsty emo twinks. This is not true in all cases however, apparently, the type of men I attract are mid to late 40's, successful professional, commonly seen at JR's or Cobalt or wherever in a power suit drinking something like a gimlet or some such nonsense.

Anyways, last night, after a rousing game of kickball.... we kicked som ASS btw and are as of the moment, undefeated, we proceeded to drink copious amount of in Chips words "brew dogs" and have a riotous time with our teammates. After a couple hours there we decide to grab some food and head over to JR's, which is the obvious choice after gorging on falafel and beer.

So we roll up to JR's in our kickball t-shirts and I start a tab, which, apparently according to the fact that I don't have my ID or Credit Card, I still have open at JR's. So Chip and I are checking out the scene when we are approached by a gentleman in a leather jacket, he proceeds to blatantly hit on Chip while making some inane small talk which I personally found to be quite humorous. I then felt the call of nature so I excused myself to utilize the facilities, on the way to the bathroom I'm stopped by a gentleman in his mid to late 40's, in a power suit, drinking what appeared to be a gimlet, apparently he had to stop me to tell me how good looking he thought I was etc. etc. etc. and so forth and so on in that fashion.

I finish in the facilities and rejoin Chip and LJG (Leather Jacket Guy) and PSG (Power Suit Guy) makes a beeline for us and immediately puts his hand around my waist. After I got tired of that read: within 30 seconds, I ask Chip if he needs to "go to the bathroom" which he does so we go upstairs to laugh about the guys that are on us like white on rice, I jokingly bitch about the fact that all I attract are sugar daddies and what's that about.

At that point LJG and PSG come upstairs to see what's taking us so long and I get cornered on the pool table by PSG which is mucho awkward and Chip got cornered on the wall by LJG. We had a little playful banter due to the lack of cute guys and the lack of anything better to do, then Chip and I decided it was time to go home so we up and left and Chip went back to his place at Gay and Homo and I went back to the ghetto of Cap. Hill.

Also of note, I had to be reminded by Chip as to what the guy who was hitting on me's name was, also apparently he's an attorney in DC. And at some point last night I misplaced my cell which is still on as I just called it.... let the hunt for the phone begin!!!

12 comments:

Mr. Bartender said...

I bet power suit guy has it and will bait you for a date in order to get it back...

sounds like you guys had fun!! :)

Manolos R My Life said...

Good luck finding your phone

aklsdjhfa said...

A few things...
1) You KNOW why you attract those guys, doe eyes.

2) He "cornered" you by the pool table because you called him over to come talk to us, silly rabbit.

3) Did I really say "brew dogs?" That's just gross. I may have to wash my mouth out with soap.

Dale said...

1). Tots, I don't know why the doe eyes doesn't work on cute guys our age?

2). he he he oops I forgot about that

3).yeah you def said brew dogs, I mean it's not THAT suprising... you WERE in a frat.

Dale said...

Mr. B: we definitely had a lot of fun, I'm still trying to coerce Chip into going to Green Lantern one of these thursdays.

oh and as Chip said when I breathed a sigh of relief on not having given Power suit guy my phone number: "I don't think it was your phone number he wanted"

aklsdjhfa said...

It's only surprising, b/c I never said it in my fraternity. I was too busy freaking out the pledges by telling them if they fucked up I'd be forced to bend 'em over, while other guys would comment "and he means it!" Their faces would become real white real quick, priceless!

Dop said...

At least the men who hit on your have jobs! I seem to attract church mice. Of course at the moment the shoe is on the other foot... Ok, nevermind.

some dude said...

creepy old guys come up to you, unfortunately, beacuse of the cute thin asian thing and - in all liklihood - for that reason only. it happens to my half-thai boyfriend all the time. we have to beat the rice queens off with a stick. they just want to treat you like a mail order vietnamese bride.

Dale said...

Dop: true, if I wanted a sugar daddy I'd be set, and it'd be fine if they weren't old enough to have been my father.

Chip: I just threw up in my mouth a little bit, I'm blaming you for the nightmares I'm obviously going to have tonight.

Some Dude: Yeah, one time I went back to this guys place and he was of the caucasian persuasion, his entire apartment was covered in Japanese Calligraphy and art.... and to top it off he put on a CD of music that belonged in a chinese restaurant.. needless to say it was a short visit.

VP of Dior said...

i hate that empty feeling in your stomach when you've lost your phone/wallet/keys. hopefully someone found your phone and is nice to enough to pick up when it rings and try and find out who the owner is.

Complacent Chase said...

PSG and LJG came upstairs to find you guys? Damn! They were persistent! There is always something crazy (or crazy people) at JR's! I love that place!

Good luck finding your phone!

The Captain said...

Can't be the same JR's from college. Where I went to school, JR's was a townie bar with fighting on a nightly basis, and locals who would take over the dance floor during hip hop songs and do country line dances. I hated that place.

Your JR's sounds a bit different.