Ok, so apparently I have no common sense, and no filter in between my brain and my mouth. Also I do stupid things, all of this can happen at once or one can be preceded and/or followed by any of the other two. This weekend was chock full of said examples.
1) Going to the Phillies/Nat's game after happy hour at Chips place of employment, preceding to not watch any of the game and just talk about the trashy people that are sitting around us.... apparently very loudly.... oops, I'm sorry but mullet's are NOT ok and as I like to term them, a hate crime against good hair. Also, post Phillies game having Chip in his non-sober state push me in my non-sober state out the metro doors because he was sure I was at my stop, and me tending to trust Chip to be right believe him.......and then proceed to get lost in Capitol Hill. Thankfully I made it back to the metro and took it the one stop I needed to before being able to peace the EF out in my domicile.
2) Going back to Rehomo for the last hurrah of the beach, seeing people I'd rather not have to deal with, Read: going out friends whom if I have a normal conversation with in daylight I want to shove Q-tips in my ears till I puncture my eardrum. Going into the water....coming out of the water wanting to be all slick like baywatch.... and then proceed to bite it hardcore as I trip and a wave hits me.... sweet...
3) Going to Halo and Cobalt with Chip + his peeps and having one of the members of Chips coterie introduce me to a guy he's on a first date with..... does anyone else see taking a guy out to Halo and Cobalt on your first date as asking for trouble?? But then having said date hit on me and totally ignore the friend and me awkwardly trying to play it off.... Yeah the night ended with me saying I was going home via metro, having the date offer to walk me to the metro, and then having the friend escort the date and I to the metro to make sure I wasn't going to make the moves on the friend....... as if! (the date was only marginally cute and I had had better offers at cobalt during the course of my tenure there)
4) Going shopping with Chip and A, and seeing a wrist band that says "Live in Love" and actually in the middle of the store holding it up, asking the sales person what it meant, not understanding and then uttering very loudly, "Live in Love, is that like Live in Maid?" and not joking.......
5) Going to a fabulous BBQ at the home of one of Chip and I's mutual friends, having a glass of white wine spilled all over my shirt and coming to the conclusion that at this party where I know pretty much the hosts and that's it, take off my shirt, put it in the dryer and just walk around for half an hour with no shirt.....oddly enough I don't think anybody cared... I used it as a conversation piece, and tried to parlay it into a reason to sit on a very good looking totally heterosexuals lap... he's one of the hosts that I actually knew but I think everyone thought it was funny.
Labor day weekend, thumbs up to you!!! even though Monday, the better part of the day was spent at the Apple store in P.City cuz Chips computer died like Meredith Baxter in a lifetime movie.....
Gay Happy Hour Attempt 2 is unfortunately table'd for the time being due to scheduling conflicts..... how many mo's does it take to organize a social function???
5 comments:
LMAO at #2. Beautiful, brilliant and graceful to boot!
Chip: you're right, nontourage is way harsh... I edited the terminology, and they're nice but after you peace'd I realized I had NOTHING to talk to them about except how awkward the situation was.....
Ugh, I have a work obligation. I'm sorry I can't come!
yikes o rama.... I think that's the general consensus.... I'm 2 for 2 this is awesome.
Yeah, it never fails- every time the Phillies come to town, so do the mullets. Horrible!
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