Thursday, November 10, 2005

The Time Has Come

Dear CBS,

After disappointing me for the better part of the past two months, I have no choice but to sever all ties for the remainder of this season of The Amazing Race. It brings me great pain to cut off, even if only temporarily, a bond that has remained steadfast, strong, and a consistent source of euphoria for going on 2+ years. The fond memories will remain, but for now I must say, "I'm sorry to tell you, but you've been eliminated from my life."

There was a strong outcry against the switch to "Family Edition," but I defended you against the naysayers. In return, I only asked that you provide me with the quality entertainment I have come to expect, as experienced in seasons 4 - 7. Not only was I denied that pleasure, but you also broke my heart by eliminating the hottest racer far too early in the season. My tears could fill an ocean...

I should have known it was coming. Teams did not leave the country before the fifth episode, and they have already returned, just two episodes later. Words cannot express how utterly boring an "Amazing Race" is that takes place primarily within the continental U.S. This is not season 1 or 2 of Road Rules! Luckily, I can watch reruns of seaons I've seen and those I have not on the Game Show Network.

Anxiously awaiting Season 9,
Chip

3 comments:

Dale said...

I would like to take this opportunity to announce the formation of the "Get Chip out of his apartment and socialize with actual people" Foundation. Donations can be given in the form of drinks, cash donations, or invites to places that don't include watching television.

That being said I will be home by myself all evening communing with my boyfriend, Blockbuster...

Dudley said...

Dale: FYI - Blockbuster is a big dirty cheating whore, as I will be communing with him as well this evening. I'm ok with it as long as you are. (And the REALLY sad part is I don't even have to work tomorrow!)

Miss Penny Lane said...

Sorry it had to come to this, but I thought that might happen. Fortunately, I never gave it a chance. You are a good man for trying, my friend...